i really want to fucking die.

i was crossing the street today and i saw someone coming and i knew she didn't see me. and i stopped moving. i stood there, waiting for her to hit me.

she saw me at the last minute and slammed her breaks, coming within a foot of me.

damn.

my MD last time reminded me about keeping myself safe.

i just don't think i want to.

the upcoming wedding makes me happy. my love makes me happy. but at the same time i want to die.

how can all this be possibly reconciled?

starving + bleeding