the sadness is coming back. i can see it on the horizon, like waves crashing in the distance...

the tranquility was wonderful while it lasted - a calm over a still pond. it was a merciful break, perhaps a gift, from god, from myself, from whomever.

but it is all coming back - and the consequences will be felt. t doesn't know anything about the sadness. he did ask about my scars, but i said i didn't want to talk about it and he accepted that.

but how can he accept what i know is coming?

starving + bleeding