so that lesbian couple who has been chasing me for the past year really pissed me off thurs night so i told them they could go fuck themselves. they sent me flowers yesterday and have been emailing, calling and texting. i've been completely ignoring them and the flowers went in the trash. a part of me feels guilty for being so unforgiving but a bigger part of me feels strong for sticking to my guns. they were toxic to me - unhealthy for me to be around. and now they're starting to get pissed, leaving me voicemails, calling me a bitch and saying i'm not perfect either etc etc etc but still i say nothing. whatever.

had a nice date last night with a bartender. really cool. of course i meet someone nice four weeks before i'm due to move back to NY. that always happens - i meet someone right before i have to move away. maybe subconsciously i become cooler and more relaxed around strangers if i know there's no possibility of a future. huh.

i ended up telling my counselor about the cuts - well there was really no way of hiding them. sometimes i think she gets frustrated with me cause i give her major attitude at times. but then she says that she's just glad that i come. so i guess that's something. she wants to see me twice a week between now and graduation.

i don't know about that.

"ya got the mother and the kid
ya got the guy and his date
we all get mad
we all get late.
Looks like somebody
forgot about us
standing on the corner
waiting for the bus...."

i still find pleasure in some things....that's good...

starving + bleeding