fat as fat can be. the story of my life.

didn't make the 6 pound goal - only lost four. going to work out every day again next week, but i'm also going to pick three days to work out twice. that should help.

my dad has been diagnosed with depression. sheesh. between him and my manic/bipolar mother its a wonder i'm still here at all.

last night i drank 130 oz of beer and two bottles of wine. calorie obsession abondoned briefly in favor of oblivion. and not a stitch hungover today. i swear, my liver would kick ass in the alcoholism olympics. that's an acheivement i can be proud of, i guess.

the other day there was a rerun of 9 0 2 1 0. it was the one where kelly takes too many dexatrim and passes out. the first time that episode aired, like in 1994 or 1995, i went right out and bought three boxes of dexatrim. i wanted to be cool like kelly. i wanted to be thin like kelly. i wanted to pass out like kelly, and have concerned friends and family worry about me. well, i didn't become cool or thin, i did pass out, but there were no concerned friends or family. and watching this episode made me want to go out and buy more dexatrim.

in fact...

starving + bleeding