...let's kick it!!

funny how when crunch time is here i have all the fucking time in the world to update. god bless procrastination.

am actually feeling v. hyper, of course due to immense amounts of caffeine and nicotine (yes i have temporarily started smoking again in honor of finals). my hands shake so much sometimes it's a little difficult to type but i'm used to it by now. after four semesters of this hell it's old hat.

all you would be lawyers out there - WHAT ARE YOU THINKING!?!?! do ANYTHING else. this shit ain't worth it. go join a gang or something!! manage a McDonalds - anything!

went out to dinner last night to celebrate a friend's birthday...it was good but i got a few sideways glances for leaving so much on my plate. so i got a box and took it home and threw it away. but it was a nice restaurant and cost a fucking bundle and i hate hate HATE spending so much money on food and throwing it away. i'm so freakin poor anyway and it's all a goddamn waste. arghhhh. but better that than actually eating it.

who gives a fuck about maritime law!??!?! apparently i had better - i need to learn the entire course today. woo.

oh and btw - have now gone a month and a week without cutting. am SO proud. but at the same time hate the ominous trepidation that comes with wondering when the fall will come. waiting for the shoe to drop i guess.

also have managed to keep the drinking to a minimum. finals does help with that. i've had no more than two glasses of wine a day since i've started. which isn't exactly quitting but certainly an improvement. early next semester will be the true challenge with the fresh financial aid and not as much schoolwork so plenty of time to get into trouble.

ok time to get started...

...really...

starving + bleeding