sometimes the thought of living exhausts me.

i was sitting in my doctor's office, in one of those little rooms wearing a horrid open front gown (yes, it's THAT time of year, folks) staring at my toenails and just thinking how tired i am. not "i need a fucking nap" tired...but TIRED. sick and TIRED.

where did all this weight come from (and for once i'm not talking about physical weight). i'm a fucking camel hauling three tons of emotional shit around the desert...all in circles, all to end up back at the start and see my tracks in the sand.

i'm tired.

starving + bleeding